It is the morning of January 1st, 2012. I am a 43 year old, 20 year veteran of the United Methodist Ministry. And, I find myself it seems, in mid-air, hurling through space, having flung myself (6 months ago) from a perfectly good cliff (aka my previous Appointment).
So... What is going to come of this "leap of faith," and of the actions I have taken? 30 days or so below me, if my best efforts fail, lie the rocks of "certain death" for my career, my reputation, my finances, my socio-economic status, and more than I care to list or think about at the moment.
In this leap, I am fully aware that I have reached what could be referred to as "terminal velocity." Around me, life and ministry are all a blur, and are all passing at such a high rate of speed, I cannot begin to perceive it all, and am unable to even pretend to be able to keep up with it.
And yet, nearing the end of my descent, in the core of my heart, there is this sense of knowing, of familiarity, and (strangely enough) of peace. I find myself internally experiencing those surreal moments of heightened and vivid awareness that come to all of us before a collision, or during a critical or traumatic incident. And, though I know not that this venture I am a part of, in planting a new United Methodist Church in Park City, will be survivable, let alone "successful," I do know... I choose to believe... I dare to hope... I frantically trust... that God is Faithful, that Jesus has called me to this "incarnational" action of faith, and that the Holy Spirit will guide, sustain, and complete this Work which God has begun.
Quite honestly, in these most harrowing moments of my ministerial calling, in brushing so near with the worst that could possibly happen, at the very least, I know, I feel, and I can perceive, that I am alive. Alive perhaps, for the very first time. It makes me wonder however, if this is what the call to ministry, and ministry itself, was supposed to be about all along... Faith, risk and leaping.
So, I am asking God, not for a safe or uneventful landing, but instead for a faithful descent on my part. And, that God's Will be done, both in Me, and in this Work in which I have invested my life and risked so much...
I believe a new United Methodist Church in Park City, Kansas, is both God's idea, and God's Will. And, that at the critical moment, as our doors officially open on Sunday AM, February 5th at 11am, that Isaiah 40:31 will come to pass, as I personally seek, and ask to live out, Philippians 1:20. If you Would like to join the leap... jump in with us on Sunday, January 8th, as we begin our pre-launch "exhibition season" Sunday mornings at 11am.
Rob Schmutz, Pastor
The Church at Park City
Zechariah 4:10a
1 comment:
Oh yes, yes, yes... needed, need, and always will need the forgiveness, grace, love and mercy of Jesus. Not just 70x7... but 24/7/365.
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